| The Twisted Mind of Briceus MacFarlane
About my Twisted Mind
Woogy Pics
(the twisted) Contact Page
The Woogy Guest Book
LINKS (The Twisted Central Nervous System )
My Journal-Type Thing
Archived Wierdness
The Online Magazine
Conspiracies
Personal Fatwas
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journal-type thing
This is basically the page for all of the most interesting things that happen (if any) in my otherwise sardonic existence. I'll post anything up here that I think might appeal to people, although quite why any of it would is a complete mystery to me, it's all stuff about how I make an idiot of myself or how I actually (very rarely, don't worry) enjoy myself, so I've got no idea why anyone should want to read it, as it's all about as interesting as sheep dung, but I've got nothing better to do than type it, so what the hey.....
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28/10/02: the last time I go to a Goth shop.
Well lets see, what did I do today....um....I woke up at 10, lay in bed till 11.00, went up the road and bought some soup at at twelve, visited my Nanny (the name I give to my Grandma), went home and ate my soup. At 1.00 I went to Southampton, wandered around looking for stuff I could afford, moaned because I couldn't afford anything, finally parted with 25 quid and bought Warcraft 3, which is BRILLIANT by the way. then I went into the Bargate centre, into a Goth shop called Alternative options andwas annoyed to find that all the cool t shirts were too expensive and these boots I want cost 200 pounds, and I don't own any clothing worth 200 pounds, let alone boots. Don't get me wrong, I'm not a goth, they just have cool T-shirts. There were 5 people in there, 2 of them looked about 500 stone, 1 was a 60 something year old Anne Widdicombe lookalike, and the other two were girls about my age, I was about to talk to them when I noticed that they were making out, in my stubborness and naivity however I still tried to get somewhere...#shudder#, I wont bother to transcribe our conversation, but somehow they got the idea that I wasn't wearing any underwear (?) and backed off out of the shop. Then I looked accross the centre and thought I could see another goth shop, it had some black leather clothes in and so I wandered into it and had a conversation with the girl at the till, I exited a few minutes later realising that I had actually walked into, not a Goth shop, but a sex shop. Man, I have to stop going out in public, it would be less embarresing for everyone..... |
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New Hobby
I have developed a new hobby, known as 'wandering around at night dressed as a Ninja making drunk youths think you are some kind of supernatural ghost'. The title is kinda self eplanatory, but it is great fun nonetheless. This all came into being a few days ago, when it was 1 in the morning and I was hopped up on life and bored, so, with most of the village asleep, I dressed up in full Ninja garb to see what I could see. After wandering around for about half an hour I came upon 4 guys of about 18 years of age who were a tad tipsy. Taking my cue, I emitted a high pitched shriek and ran at them swinging a stick I had found. One of them noticed me, nd then fell over and went to sleep, whilst the other 3 walked off. Somewhat disheartened by this rather pathetic reception I went back home and read a book, then went to sleep at 10 am and got woken up by some idiot saying that I had a parcel delivery who left just as I was opening the door. Bloody Parcel Force.....
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Is life really worth living; Pro's & Con's
Pro's: ~Love
~TV
~Computers
~Sex
~Books
~Robert Rankin
~fatty foods
~Music by The Beatles Con's ~Hate
~Pain
~Maths
~Manafactured Pop
~Carol Vorderman
~War
~Suffering
~Pressure
~All the badness in the world (if nobody was alive there would be no badness) I'm afraid that the Con's seem to outway the Pro's at the moment, so either kill yourself, or send me another reason(s) for or against living, and if I deem it worthy it shall be put up for all the world to see (except the dead people)! If however you wish to live, to hold onto every last grain of sand running through the hour-glass of your life, then you can see how long you have left before you die naturaly and get eaten by worms as you rot by going to the address below:
The truth behind bananas!
Bananas. We all use them, we all need them in todays banana orientated society, but are they just a cheap imitation of cheese and pickle sandwiches? Everything that cheese and pickle sandwiches have, bananas have, but we still use them? Is it because of the endless propoganda films created by the Germans during the second world war? Is it because of the basic human need and desire for something yellow and peelable in life? Perhaps we will never know, but hey, we can use up butterfly space by asking for your opinions, so go ahead! Send your thoughts on the subject to me, and in the meantime, you can visit this pro-banana site:
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The great Southampton Scam
One of my more recent madcap money grabbing schemes included wandering around Southampton dressed up in a suit saying that I was from St Sebastians school for boys and asking for raffle donations. This failed pretty damned miserably as the best we got was the phone number for Waterstones central office, and we had to go see the branch manager to get that as well. It was pretty pathetic results wise, so in a sombre state I decided to re-spike my hair (which had been flattened partly for disguise purposes and partly for trust reasons) and go to see Minority Report, at the cinema these 2 guys tried to pick a fight as well, but that's another story...
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Robert Rankin Book Signing!
Yes! It's true! There was a Robert Rankin book signing in Bournemouth! Yay!!! As soon as I heard about it I made plans with my friend Joe to wander down there. It started at 6.30pm, so we got there at 5.00pm, got ourselves some milkshakes from Shakeaways, got asked for a cigarette, got asked for money, got sworn at, got told that a certain person didn't live in Bournemouth, and finally made our way to the book shop. It was to celebrate his latest book; 'The Hollow Chocolate Bunnies of the Apocalypse', which is a cracking read. I took 10 hard back first editions of his books with me and got him to sign them, so that was good. He was great, he was very nice, and after signing things he gave a talk for about an hour and a half, then finished with a song from his upcoming stage production: 'DIY: The Musical'. After that, he invited everyone (there were only about 20 people) down to the pub next door (a customary end to all Rankin events) which is something that few authors would do. And so, just before leaving to go to the pub, Joe and I 'Acquired' official cardboard publicity posters and got them signed. We then went to the pub and chatted to Robert for an hour or so before making our way back to Joe's place. It was great, such camraderie between strangers, it was quite uplifting....Great night out.... |
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